interesting reading

I have started reading "Feeding the Hungry Heart" by Geneen Roth. This is the book that my therapist recommended. I'm fascinated by it and look forward to time in the evening to read again. So much of it I have felt and experienced. Her recounts of her personal binges hit home and her advice on how to step out of this disorder are so easily understood and kind.

One thing I read last night I found particularly interesting. In all my "diet" attempts in the past and presently, I have stayed away from what I refer to as "trigger" foods. Foods that I don't trust myself to eat because I'm afraid it will open up the binging abyss. Roth writes: "Buy one 'forbidden' food per week. Eat it when you are hungry and when you want it. Over and over give yourself the message that you need not deprive yourself, that you can be trusted to care for yourself."

I had never thought before that by staying away from red-light foods I wasn't trusting myself - I thought I was protecting myself. This is very interesting to me. I can really see that I don't trust myself and not just with food but in other areas of my life as well. I know trust is such an important, if not the most important trait in a relationship. I am just stunned that it has never occured to me that I should be trusting myself. Knowledge is power.